Tuesday Night Plumber's Crack

Tuesdays are long

Start with an hour an half of Information Systems

Then I go put in a full day's work

And I end up back at UVU

For a 3 hour Lean Management class.

By the time I get to that class,

I'm very pooped.

The class is pretty boring.

The professor is really nice though,

So it's kinda a wash.

There is something, however,

That makes every Tuesday a bad day.

What is it???

The Tuesday Night Plumber's Crack

There's a man in the class...easy 350 lbs.

Somehow no matter where I choose to sit.

He always sits right in front of me or right near me.

EVERY week this guy has a plumber's crack.

And it's not a small one either.

*Seriously---8 inches of buttocks clevage*

It hurts my eyes.

The sideways smile.

Can he not feel that his pants

are only covering up half his arse???

He HAS to able to feel the breeze???

Ewh..how sick that his naked butt touches our chairs!!

SICK--please pass the hand sanitizer.

I try so hard not to look.

But it's just one of those diasters

That no matter how horrific it is

You still look at it.

It really haunts me.

The coin slot.

And makes me sick to my stomache.

But everywhere I turn

THERE IT IS.

The whole class is in agreement with me.

I suggested we draw straws

And the loser has to tell him

That he's blinding us.

I had a very similar problem once in high school choir.

But that's a post in itself.

And I don't know if I want to confess to that now.

But both times there were

OBVIOUS solutions to this problem

A) Buy a longer shirt

B) Buy bigger pants

C) Buy a bodysuit --the kind that snap at the crotch

If they're too poor to buy new clothes...then

C) Bring a blanket to class and wrap it around yourself

D) Wear your backpack throughout the entire class.

Anything would be appreciated. Yuck!!

4 more weeks of

The Tuesday Night Plumber's Crack

Will I/Can I survive it?

One of my pet peeves....

Okay, I was going to post some pics and share some family news but blogger is NOT cooperating with uploading pics. So I'll save that for later. Instead I'll tell a funny pet peeve of mine that repeatedly happened last week.
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So when I'm at work I'm in charge of answering the phones. This situation comes up ALL the time. It ALWAYS goes EXACTLY like this every time.

Situation--

You see a missed call on your phone from an unknown number and there is no voicemail...what do you do?

A) just ignore it and figure they would have left a message or will call back if it is really important
B) assume it was a wrong number
C) call the number back and have this conversation with the receptionist,

"Affiliated First this is Brittani"
"Um, I had a missed call from this number........"

(At this point-- I am like, oh great here we go.)

"Well, like I said, this is a business. We have lots of people working here. Did they leave you a voicemail?"
"No"

(At this point--I am hoping that the person on the other line is getting the message through my tone that this is weird that they called back and even weirder that they are still on the line talking to me.)

"Huh, are you doing title work and expecting a call from us"
"No"

(They still don't get it. They just stay on the line. Now I am PRAYING that they will finally realize they shouldn't have called back....obviously it was a wrong number if someone called you and didn't leave a message. But of course they DON'T get it so I have to suggest this.)

"Well, I guess I can buzz everyone that works here and ask them if they called you. What is you name?"
"Joe Shmoe"

"Great! Hold while I go find everyone that works here and see if they happened to call you Joe Shmoe."

(Now I KNOW that no one intentionally called this person. Still I have to buzz/go find everyone in the entire office and ask them if they called Joe Shmoe. None of them ever did.)

"Joe Shmoe, I have asked everyone that works here and no one seems to have called you."
"Um, okay."
"Sorry, I guess our employees aren't perfect and sometimes they misdial. Bye"

Okay, am I crazy or are people crazy?!?!?! Do you call back unknown numbers that don't leave voicemails?!?!?! If you did, would you make it go all the way to the point of making me find EVERYONE that works in our office?!?!?!